What are you hanging onto? Remember when that person hurt you, talked about you behind your back, or to your face and it got under your skin? How about when they said that they were your friend and they loved you but gossiped about you behind your back and you found out. These amongst other digs are hard to move passed and get over. It’s natural to be hurt and replay these things over and over in your mind, but carrying these things for years will harm you. They may harm your outlook on future relationships and your relationship with God. Deep offenses should not be carried. It’s okay to be hurt but you must move on. Forgive them and ask God for the strength to move on. Also in some situations just because you forgive them doesn’t mean to go back and have a close relationship with them. Forgive them, pray for them and leave them alone. The bible tells us in Colossians 3:13 (NLT), “Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others.”

Key POINT: Christ says, “If you forgive those who sin against you your heavenly Father will forgive you. But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.” (Matthew 6:14-15 NLT)

Don’t allow your offenses to keep you from the forgiveness God has extended to you. Live your best life, don’t let the nastiness of others hurt your relationship with God, it’s not worth it. Whether they choose to apologize to you or not, still forgive them, live your life.


NLT=New Living Translation


“The Lord merely spoke, and the heavens were created.  He breathed the word, and all the stars were born.” (Psalm 33:6 NLT)

Going back to the beginning



From the beginning of the bible we see creation.  God spoke and things and humans came into being.  Proverbs 18:20-21 helps us to see our role in the direction of our own lives and what an impact our mouths can have, whether good or bad, “A man’s [moral] self shall be filled with the fruit of his mouth;  and with the consequence of his words he must be satisfied [whether good or evil].  Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and they who indulge in it shall eat the fruit of it [for death or life].” (AMP)  Fast forwarding into the New Testament in Ephesians the same idea is repeated, “Let no foul or polluting language, nor evil word nor unwholesome or worthless talk [ever] come out of your mouth, but only such [speech] as is good and beneficial to the spiritual progress of others, as is fitting to the need and the occasion, that it may be a blessing and give grace (God’s favor) to those who hear it.” (Ephesians 4:29 AMP)  These scriptures help us to see how our words have creative power and can build and tear down.

Words can change the atmosphere.  Have you ever been in a room and someone says something and its at the perfect time making a difficult situation seem better, or where someone says something and totally destroys another person’s self confidence.  The scriptures above help us to see how we should be encouraging, loving and careful with our words.  Just one word can spur someone to start a better career or even just brighten their day.  Not only do words affect others they can affect yourself.  Your self talk needs to have the creative power of the Holy Spirit, which is uplifting and fruitful.  Speak His promises over your life and situations, such as “I’m the head and not the tail”, “the works of my hands are blessed,”  “the fruit of my body is blessed,”  “I’m blessed coming in and going out,”  these just a few verses and they are found in Deuteronomy chapter 28.  Pick scriptures that speak to the area where you need uplifting and create in yourself, using the power of the word of God, an atmosphere that will bring forth the creative power of the Holy Spirit and through that you can be uplifting outwardly showing others how to create with the life giving power of the word of God.

James 3:3-9 MSG
[3-4] A bit in the mouth of a horse controls the whole horse. A small rudder on a huge ship in the hands of a skilled captain sets a course in the face of the strongest winds. A word out of your mouth may seem of no account, but it can accomplish nearly anything—or destroy it! [5-6] It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that. By our speech we can ruin the world, turn harmony to chaos, throw mud on a reputation, send the whole world up in smoke and go up in smoke with it, smoke right from the pit of hell. [7-9] This is scary: You can tame a tiger, but you can’t tame a tongue—it’s never been done. The tongue runs wild, a wanton killer. With our tongues we bless God our Father; with the same tongues we curse the very men and women he made in his image. Curses and blessings out of the same mouth!

Satan will even have you destroy your reputation based on the words that you allow to come out of your mouth.  Be careful what you say.  What say starts in your mind.  Create, in your mind a place for God’s word to dwell.  So when you feel overwhelmed and you want to create chaos with your words, you can remember and draw on the true words of scripture to bring you back under control.


The Promise/Plan Beyond The Pain

The best example that we have to show a promise executed through pain, is the death and resurrection of Christ.

“He was beaten, he was tortured, but he didn’t say a word.  Like a lamb taken to be slaughtered and like a sheep being sheared, he took it all in silence.  Justice miscarried, and he was led off- and did anyone really know what was happening?  He died  without a thought for his own welfare, beaten bloody for the sins of my people.  They buried him with the wicked, threw him in a grave with a rich man, Even though he’d never hurt a soul or said one word that wasn’t true.  Still, it’s what God had in mind all along, to crush him with painThe plan was that he give himself as an offering for sin so that he’d see life come from it-life, life, and more life.  And God’s plan will deeply prosper through him.  Out of that terrible travail of soul, he’ll see that it’s worth it and be glad he did it…”

Reading this scripture we can see that Christ went through immense pain in order to see the promise of salvation and our abundant life come to fruition through his death and resurrection.

Through this example we can take rest in knowing that whatever pain we go through there is a PLAN beyond it.  Trust God, don’t let go.  God will equip you and guide your steps.  Psalms says that God’s “word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path.” (Psalm 119:105 KJV)

If God has given you a dream and you are going through a very difficult time right now and you can’t see through the tears, allow God’s word to be your light.  Nothing is impossible with God.  All you need is one encounter, one meeting that can change your whole life.  If God spoke something to you BELIEVE IT!  His track record is flawless, what he has begun he will absolutely finish, he is faithful and never fails.  Sometimes things don’t come the way we would like them to or in our timing, but rest in the Lord and know he will never leave you nor forsake you.  He knows what’s best and is skillfully shaping you as you move through your destiny in him.  Lean to his wisdom.  When he is first in your life and you rely on his guidance, you can’t go wrong.  Whatever you are going through will work out for the best.


“He has sent me to tell those who mourn that the time of the Lord’s favor has come, and with it, the day of God’s anger against their enemies.  To all who mourn in Israel, he will give a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of despair….”  (Isaiah 61:2-3 NLT)


“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.  In all they ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths.  Be not wise in thine own eyes:  fear the Lord, and depart from evil.”  (Proverbs 3:5-7 KJV)


“This is my comfort in my affliction:  for thy word hath quickened me.” (Psalm 119:50 KJV)


NLT:  New Living Translation

KJV: King James Version

Perspective, The Struggle Is Real

“….That’s why we can be so sure that every detail in our lives of love for God is worked into something good.”  (Romans 8:28 MSG)

Pessimist:  A person who tends to see the worst aspect of things or believe that the worst will happen (defeatist).

Optimist:  A person who tends to be hopeful and confident about the future or the success of something.


How do you see things?  Are you an optimist or a pessimist.  Your perspective can greatly contribute to how you navigate life.  Being extremely negative can hinder you from living your best life and keep you from making valuable relationships.  Let’s say you are approaching a new situation; whether in the form of a job, friendship, potential dating relationship.  Since we are human we will draw from knowledge gained from past situations.  If you have experienced some hardship in either type and you are a pessimist, you will automatically put a stop sign on moving forward because all of the negative thoughts of the past cripple your progression.  On the other hand, as an optimist your approach will be different.  As an optimist you will always see the greener side of situations and more than likely take more risks.  As Christians (Christ followers) we can listen to the voice of the Lord and use His word as compass for our lives.

Through God’s word we can be healed and delivered from wrong mindsets that hinder us and take hold of the abundance He has laid out for us.   Hurtful or traumatic pasts and hurtful words spoken to us can play a huge role in our development but it is up to us how we allow it to further affect our futures.  No matter what you have gone through or whatever your perspective is on life, God is able to break through all of that and love you through to victorious living.  Holding on to hurt and thinking everyone is the same as the people who hurt you is absolutely not true.  People change, things change and you can change.  The Word of God says, “So, what do you think?  With God on our side like this, how can we lose?  If God didn’t hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn’t gladly and freely do for us?  And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God’s chosen?  Who would dare even to point a finger”  The One who died for us-who was raised to life for us!-is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us.” (Romans 8:31-37 MSG)  With God on your side you can accomplish and push through the toughest of thoughts and situations.  He did not die to leave us in mediocrity of any form, He wants you to be whole and in peace knowing that it is okay to move forward.    God uses our situations as a platform to teach us, the pain of certain situations, he will use to make you stronger and more resilient.  “As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good…” (Genesis 50:20).  Don’t allow your thought pattern to kill your progress in relationships and life.


Jeremiah 29:11  MSG “…I’ll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home.  I know what I’m doing.  I have it all planned out-plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.”


Have hope for your future  

MSG:  The Message Bible

Google definitions used above